While I know I intended this blog to be solely dedicated to family news, I believe that God has opened the door for me to also use this as a personal thought/journey/random musing outlet. While there will be things that I might say, rather type, that some might not agree with or judge, that is not for me to worry about.
Here are just a few thoughts in this head of mine:
I am so very excited for what is ahead for our little family. Last night, while reading Duck and Goose- her favorite book already- Eden started really moving. Ryan put is hand on my lower stomach, and for about 15 minutes just pushed her with his fingers to get a quick kick/shove back. The look on his face is one I am sure I will see frequently. the first time she opens her eyes and looks up at him, when she first utters the word dadda, her first crawl and steps, when she will run into his arms when he gets home from work, while the two of them sit on the couch together and she reaches over to hold his hand, when she tells him stories of what we did that day, when she asks him only questions he can answer... oh how excited I am!
while there are so many things right now going on in life that are SO VERY UNCERTAIN, I have felt an indescribable peace. when most find out what is going on in our life right now, they are surprised to see us so peaceful. I can ONLY say, "It's all God. Because if it was me... I would be freaking out!" I feel like right now, God is asking Ryan and I, along with our extended family and their situations, to fully trust in Him and His promises. He is faithful. I know this.
I look over my life and see His hand over me. While there were times when I didn't believe that God was really there, or that He cared... I look back and know He was there and He did care. His arms were open wide, I just needed to walk inside. I am choosing to walk in His light and direction, no matter how unrealistic it may seem, or uncertain. I know He will carry me, my family, our daughter... God I am trusting you.
